4 Steps For Effective Small Groups

According to Lifeway Research, following community, the second most important desire among young adults is participation in a small-group meeting to discuss life application of Scripture in a deep way. They don’t want pat answers when the Bible is communicated, yet they want to explore the complexities of scripture regarding foundational Christian truths. Christianity used to be a set of facts that were meant to be proven, but young adults have an increased desire to examine the mysteries of faith by pondering a lot of difficult questions. They understand that faith isn’t about having a pat answer, but rather about a journey with many challenges and struggles.

For tips on preparing a deep Bible study, click here. More than just presenting a Bible study, however, is creating a culture of intensity and wonder that points people to the truth of Scripture. The good news is that you don’t have to be a seminarian to create this atmosphere in your small group. You just have to be willing to take your young adults through a journey of discovering the depth and simplicity of the Bible. Here are four important things to consider when creating a culture of small group depth…

1. Teach theology, not topics

Help young adults understand who God is (his nature and character). This helps them discover how to see things through the lens of who God is. We can’t underestimate the importance of knowing God and looking at the world from a God-centered perspective. The challenge with teaching topics, is that not everyone is dealing with the exact same issues. For example, if you discuss the proper way to handle finances to 18-25 year-olds, only about 25% of your group will benefit immediately from that subject. The reason is because stats indicate that almost 75% of college age students receive financial aid from their parents. Everyone, however, deals with issues that require them to place God at the center of their circumstance.

2. Point people toward Scripture

It amazes me how many young adults don’t know how to read their Bible. They may know some snappy Bible verses that they can take out of context, but they don’t understand how to study it, or why they should. We must communicate that the Bible is our authority on truth and our guide in life. Have people read their Bible’s out loud, have them underline passages of Scripture, and facilitate group discussions. If you can get them to publically read and discuss the Bible, chances are they will start those same practices privately.

3. Challenge thinking, not behavior

The method of telling people what they cannot or should not do, doesn’t seem to be working very well. No one is transformed by their behavior, but the Bible clearly states, in Romans 12:2, that we are to be transformed by the renewing of our mind. When we don’t challenge thinking, we are enabling bored, unmotivated Christians. The rich young ruler came to Jesus because he assumed that there had to be more to it than just doing the right things. Our approach of boiling everything down to “here’s 3 things to do” creates an expectation that being a Christian is just doing things. They want and need to know why we do what we do. They want to know why their friends who’ve done everything right, still have things go very badly for them. When young adults begin understanding the why, they figure out the how.

4. Give permission to ask questions

Young adults love to ask questions. They are, by nature, opinionated and argumentative. They are also extremely curious and hungry for truth. They are asking…”How do I know this is true?” “What if Jesus was just a man?” “If God is love, why does He allow people go to Hell?” “Is homosexuality really a sin?” Their whole life, they’ve either been told to not ask questions, or they’ve been given pat answers. We must be willing to engage them in deep theological discussions because that’s what they’re asking. You don’t even need to have all the answers, just be willing to help people find the answers.

Trying Not To Croak in Young Adult Ministry

Post provided by Joel VanBriggle.

Joel and his wife Gail serve as the lead pastors at Community Gospel Church in Northvale, NJ.  Feel free to connect via Twitter, @joelzworld and on Facebook

Dodging semis, cars, and motorcycles, and then leaping from log to log, avoiding the crocodiles and snakes is no easy task.   For me, ministry to young adults resembles the plight of the old Atari game, Frogger!  The goal of the game seemed simple enough; lead the little frogs to their home.  Each frog had its place, yet the journey would be unique and filled with many twists and turns.  And so it is with young adult ministry!   

Reaching young adults and helping them find their place as the living Church in their world is increasingly difficult.  The tension between living “in the world and not of the world” has become more stressful as issues like relationships, sex, career, religion, and the like are often shaped by numerous influences, and unfortunately, the Church may barely be on the radar.

Much like Frogger, we can effectively navigate young adults to their respective places in life, but it may require us to take some childhood advice for crossing the road; stop, look, and listen.

STOP:  There are a couple things we need to stop.  (1) Stop feeling guilty.  I don’t know about you, but I’ve found myself feeling guilty that effectiveness and connectivity with this group can be so ridiculously difficult at times.  The truth is, we didn’t create the amount of traffic and distractions that may exist on the road of life.  We are simply called to help navigate, but unfortunately, young adults do not come with an Atari joystick!  (2) Stop relying solely on creative programming.  Success in Frogger is achievable because there is a clear goal.  For a more extensive look at this, Andy Stanley talks about clarifying the win in his book, Seven Practices of Effective Ministry.  At times, I’ve sought to have a creative hook to snag the interest of young adults without an end game in mind.  We really need to stop and determine what we’re actually trying to accomplish.  Are we merely attempting to re-church young adults or are we leading them toward true discipleship?  A good follow up question; “What attributes earmark a Christ-following Young Adult?”   In my experience, young adults are not nearly as impressed with our creative programming as we are!  They’re looking for simple, practical, yet well-thought out ways to live out their faith “in the world and not of the world.” 

LOOK:  One of the known attributes of this younger generation is volunteerism.  Please don’t misinterpret my statement.  Christ-following isn’t a non-profit, service organization designed to gather volunteers; however, none of us will deny that fact that Jesus modeled and called each disciple to serve (Mark 10:43-45; 1 Peter 4:10.)  Serving is one of the most natural indicators that a person understands his or her role in the Body of Christ.  Take a moment to think about your church.  How many young adults are serving in ministry?  Too many times our organizational structures hinder connecting young adults into ministry.  Old men are ushers; young moms and “mature’ ladies work in the nursery; children’s’ church is a hodge-podge of parents with kids; and the sound booth is often vigilantly protected by some 40-60 year old, obsessive compulsive guy who loves the security of his job and space!  This may not be the picture of your church, but I’ve been around!  An effective discipleship model is helping young adults connect with meaningful ministry opportunities—they’re often just waiting to be asked.  Remember—this is about “look”—Look for creative opportunities within the church AND outside the church.  Talk with your various ministry leaders to find out their needs and how your young adults might fill those places of ministry.  Soup kitchens, local shelters and civic groups—embrace this and find opportunities.  Short-term missions trip and service projects have a unique way of forging lasting relationships and spiritual bonds.  Many times the byproduct of serving is a heightened spiritual awareness.  There will be a Holy Spirit tug for ministry preparedness and even holiness as God fine-tunes the heart.  Serving has a wonderful way of inducing spiritual growth.     

Stop…Look…and…

LISTEN:  As a 34 year old lead pastor that grew up in the church, I realize that I can be the biggest hindrance at times.  I spent the greater part of the first 18 year of life learning from school teachers, and then attending Bible college where I paid people to deposit their knowledge into me.  Currently, I teach at a local A/G Bible Institute, and as a pastor, people come each week to hear me impart my incredibly vast knowledge and Biblical insights in such clever ways…needless to say, “talking-head syndrome” becomes very natural and easy!  (I hope you perceived the tongue-in-cheek nature of my previous statement!)  Talking-head is a comfortable, yet deadly liability in ministry to young adults. On the contrary, listening is a powerful asset!  I mentioned earlier that the path for each frog in Frogger is unique…so are the stories of each young adult under your care.  Begin to listen to each one’s personal journey.  I have found that personal struggles and concerns leak out in subtle ways in casual conversations. For the perceptive person, this can lead to meaningful and even life-changing conversations.  Listen to the Holy Spirit.  Listen to God’s Word.  Listen to those entrusted to you!    

Stop. Look. Listen. These three will keep you from croaking in Young Adult Ministry! 

**SPLAT**

Common Challenges of Young Adult Leadership

1.      The challenge of developing an integrated ministry.

What happens when the young adults in your ministry enter a certain stage in life or hit an age where your model of ministry no longer meets their needs?  Typically, people outgrow their loyalty and move on.  Having a young adult ministry is a great start, but if there is no assimilation strategy, then we are simply creating another ministry finish line. We often want to grow our ministry, but we tend to lose sight on the importance of growing the church. We must be intentional about integrating young adults into the life of the church.

A couple things to consider when thinking about assimilation…

-           Develop relationships with older people in the church

Young adults actually want and need relationship with older people in your church. Titus chapter 2 describes older women speaking into the lives of younger women and older men speaking into the lives of younger men. Not only is building relationships good for assimilation, but it’s also a healthy way to make disciples.

For more thoughts on developing relationships click here

-          Support other ministries in the church

Young adults are creative, passionate, and innovative. They have ideas that can enhance other ministries in your church. Maybe they can conduct an annual banquet for the senior adults or offer free baby sitting at the church on a Friday night.

For other thoughts on assimilation click here  

2.      The challenge of developing a ministry that is supported.

Let’s face it, children's ministry, youth ministry, music ministry, and even ministry to senior adults often gets more attention and more support than young adult ministry.  It is important, however, to not allow what you cannot do keep you from what you can do.  Focus your attention and your conversation around what you can do and around the support that you do have.  Try not to recruit support, but rather create a ministry that people want to support.  Is your ministry known for what it can't do, or for what it can do? 

You can offer volunteers for children’s ministry. You can serve the youth ministry at their crazy event. You can greet people at their car on a rainy day with an umbrella in hand. You can get 20-somethings involved in the church mission trip. Instead of complaining that there is no room for you to meet in, you can meet in a house or coffee shop.

Once people see how faithful your ministry is with the little resources it has, people will want to support you.

3.  The challenge of leading young adults through the tension.

This generation is more culturally aware than any generation to go before them. Access to information is literally at our fingertips. With that in mind, 20-somethings are provoked by information and desire to be in the center of it all. Young adults have no interest in staying away from hurt, sin, chaos, and calamity. They feel the best way to restore, fix, and redeem the world is from the inside out. Young adults want to engage in culture, feel the effects of it, and then figure out a way to repair the parts of society that are damaged.

This is a real challenge for many ministers. The reality is that we are called to be the salt of the earth. Salt is best spread out and scattered. Salt makes things better, leaves people thirsty, and keeps things from going bad. It’s obvious that godly influence is needed the cultural epicenters of our communities. It’s also apparent that this is a generation who’s ready to collide with the negative effect head on. How do we encourage young adults to engage in culture, but not be influenced by it?

We lead

The Corinthian church faced some similar challenges. Corinth was an extremely pagan and pluralistic city. The church found themselves in the tension of trying to live like Jesus while also being so consumed by the lust, selfishness, and consumerism of their day. Someone had to lead them and help them navigate through the challenges. In 1 Corinthians 4:15-16 Paul writes, Even though you have ten thousand guardians in Christ, you do not have many fathers, for in Christ Jesus I became your father through the gospel. Therefore I urge you to imitate me.  

Similar to the people of Corinth, this generation has many things influencing them, but they are looking for someone to lead them. You can show them how to heal the hurting, restore the broken, love the sinner, and truly engage the culture without compromise. Together as a community of young adults, you can be salt by making things better, leaving people thirsty for more of Jesus, and keeping things from going bad.

For some examples on how to do this click here and here.

Jesus Isn't On Twitter: Why the Church Is Missing The Point

Post provided by Jeremy Stephens, author of Quarter-Life. Follow Jeremy on Twitter @jeremylovesYHWH

“I love Jesus, it’s His Church that I can’t stand.”
Echoes of this sentiment run throughout this generation of young adults within and outside of Christianity. There are books dedicated to the topic, entire ministries devoted to bringing quarter-lifers back into the fold. And amidst the tumult of what seems to be a mass exodus of twenty-somethings, church leaders are left shaking their heads, wondering how it could have happened differently, what they should have done or not done…
…and meanwhile a generation of people are left with a misguided view of the Church that Christ said He would build. Which also means they are left with an incomplete view of Jesus Himself.

There are massive differences between the Church now and the Church as it stood in the first century. Jesus didn’t have Twitter. The apostles weren’t Facebook friends. You couldn’t Google Paul and find out about what he did prior to being the amazing preacher and missionary we see in the epistles.

Yet those things, those differences (massive as they may seem), are really not the reason why young people are turning away.

The real reason that they are leaving, and thus the focus we, as leaders, should have in our loving pursuit to allow for the return of our prodigal children is that we are missing the point.

In my book, Quarter-Life, I approach the issues that are most relevant to, that are most directly affecting, the unique struggles quarter-lifers are facing. And in looking at a few of those issues, we can catch some glimpses of how we’ve missed it, and how we can shift our focus back.

Mortality

Society doesn’t talk about it, churches don’t talk about it. And yet it is one of the most unifying of our experiences as humans, unnatural though it may be. The return into civilization that is marked by college graduation oftentimes comes with the tragic realization that death is eminent. Parents show their age, sometimes for the first time, and in the middle of their attempts to set up their career and life, the realness of death blasts itself into the conversation.

This generation has near-unlimited access to information. Along with that near-unlimited access is a near-unlimited supply of opinions, both correct and false. If society skirts the issue of mortality, shouldn’t it be the church’s responsibility to pick up the slack? If our focus is truly eternal, shouldn’t this, the most directly theological of the quarter-life issues faced, be a part of the discussion?

Marriage

Our generation has a redefined understanding of family. The nuclear family as a standard has been overthrown by myriad alternative family dynamics, resulting in more questions than answers for quarter-lifers looking to settle into the relationship God has for them. How are we reaching them on an individual level when our only response to this cultural shift is a rally cry against the sins we see? The Church has a responsibility to move forth in both love and power. Yet if our whole message is power, and the world around them is their only exposure to love, why are we confused when they choose the world? What would the effect be if we took some time to quit focusing on the wrongs we see in relationships in our world and dedicate ourselves to displaying the true purpose of marriage…to reflect in a lesser sense the love Christ has for His Church?

Career

The pursuit of a job, especially in a market such as ours, is strenuous and can oftentimes be debilitating to the faith of a believer. The simple cover-all answer that “God has a plan” has all but become church-ese in its overuse. What does that phrase mean played out? Spoken in isolation, the words “God has a plan” become simply another voice in the cacophony of voices competing for the attention of the quarter-lifer looking to settle into a career. How can the Church hope to reach them in this area? It isn’t by being more loud. It is by being more real. Simply chanting the words does little apart from really showing what it means to be a part of God’s plan. Why does it matter? How can we know we are in His plan? What if I can’t tell? The Church has to answer questions before it says things that cause more.

Finance

One of the biggest differences between what Jesus preached and the world around Him is the total dependence on God for all of the things we are given. Our world preaches individualism when it comes to financial success, it preaches more is better, and it preaches that financial stability equals safety and comfort. Jesus preached that true success is investing in eternal things, not temporary; that even with nothing we can have joy in our God; that any kind of stability in this world, any kind of safety or comfort, should not be sought in exchange for the sometimes dangerous adventure God has for us.

Yet, if all we have comes from God, and we are simply stewards, how does it look to our generation when 2.7% of all believers, of all ages, tithe? How does it look if the Church, in many ways, preaches the same money=success message that the rest of the culture preaches?

If the choice is the same for both, except the Church asks them to give and the world doesn’t, why are we surprised when they pick the world?

Life

The root of each of these issues, each of these necessary shifts in our focus as a Church, is a simple return to being real. The only way we can hope to quit missing the point is when we return to being a Church that is constantly seeking God and all that entails. The Church has to quit being a building and return to being a community. It has to quit copying society and show why what we believe is better. It has to have members that practice what is preached.

And it has to have leaders that truly know why love is the greatest commandment.

Top 5 Posts of 2011

There have been 77 blogs posted to this page in 2011. Below are the 5 most read posts since January 2011. The top post has received over 3,500 hits. I hope you all have wonderful Christmas and a happy New Year. We will begin posting again to this site beginning the first week of January.

#5 - 4 Ways to Measure Young Adult to Leader Relationships - Originally posted July 14, 2011.

#4 - 5 Ways to Get Young Adults to Leave Your Church - Originally posted February 23, 2011.

#3 - Rob Bell - Does Love Win? - Originally posted March 29, 2011.

#2 - Top 10 Young Adult Ministry Websites - Originally posted March 23, 2011.

#1 - Confessions From a 31 Year Old "Single" Adult - Originally posted October 6, 2011.
       For part 2 of this post, click here

Compassion at the Core

Submitted by: Lindsay Fosner of Seattle, WA lindsayfosner@gmail.com

“I don’t mind living off of pennies.” She said. “I just want to help people, that’s all I care about.” Rachael is about to graduate from the University of Washington with a degree in Women’s Studies. She plans to work for AmeriCore for a year after graduating. She’s part of the generation that many predict will be known as the ‘Compassion Generation.’ These are today’s 20-somethings. They spend their time trying to find a meaningful way to improve the world, stand up for justice, and lend a hand to the poor. Social justice seems to be what pumps through their veins.

As a young adult and a minister, I see this as a huge opportunity for the cause of the gospel. Jesus was perhaps the greatest advocate for social justice who has ever walked this soil called earth. Every message he preached and the life he lived calls to us… to serve the poor, defend the broken, and see humanity as God’s dignified and beloved creation. He validated sinners by eating with them, uplifted the status of women by speaking to them, and invited the diseased to be near him. He ran towards the social outcasts and those in greatest need.

These 20-somethings have a desire to get dirty too. Who better to lead them into that effort than Christ followers? I believe with all of my heart that if the church takes a large step towards reaching the poor in their city that today’s young adults will take several steps toward the church.

Perhaps we should look at young adult ministry from a different perspective. We tend to think of ministry and discipleship in terms of services, bible studies and gatherings. What if young adult ministry was built around serving the marginalized community locally and abroad?

Locally it could be as simple as serving a free meal on Saturday evenings in your downtown area where homeless people sleep, or providing a day-camp every summer for foster children or the children of inmates. It could mean doing repair work for single mothers or widows, or volunteering every week at an AIDS hospital or rehabilitation facility. Who are the neediest in your community? How can you love them?

This generation is also concerned with global issues. Perhaps your group can take on a cause like raising awareness about human trafficking or building orphanages for children with AIDS. They sky is the limit… the needs are endless.

Several powerful results will be produced as you work together “on mission.” First, community will naturally occur as you serve side-by-side. Secondly, Christ-likeness will form in hearts as they practice doing the work that God has commanded us to do. Thirdly, your church will find favor in your community and among this generation. Fourthly, the simplicity of this kind of ministry will keep both leaders and young adults engaged and energized for the long haul. There is nothing more exciting than watching a person’s life change before your eyes!

This generation is passionate and ready to serve. They will find a way to let the compassion that has been birthed in their souls out, with or without the church. May we see and seize the opportunity that is before us.

As Trevor, a 20-something Jesus lover stated, “I pray that the church explodes out of the walls of the sanctuary, that it flies a banner of grace and hope rather than a banner of happiness and success. That the church would "be together and have all things in common," that it would begin to "break bread together from house to house, and take meals together with gladness and sincerity of heart," that it would break off the chains of tradition and by-laws, that it would return to its position of being a humble community of servants, with doors, very nearly literally, always open.”

Young Adult Gatherings

Provided by Reza Zadeh

The gatherings for young adult ministries can be vastly different. After looking at many different models of young adult ministries all over the country and even the world, I have seen that the type of gathering really isn’t important, yet the important thing for young adults is that there are other young adults available for them to connect with.

Last semester we had a student from the local college ask me if he could do his Senior Thesis on our young adult community. He was an Anthropology major and he wanted to find out why people came week after week. He thought that people would say that it was the great technology, graphics or videos. Or maybe the lights that we use, or the facility we meet in or the teaching that they hear. Yet his findings were very different, he found that people came back week after week because their friends were there and they could connect with other young adults. So just “build it and they will come."

The following are some suggestions on gatherings that may inspire you to start something within your church. We always say, “Don’t try to start something great, just start something.”

Sunday School Class
• Some of our churches are doing a great job reaching young adults in our weekend worship services but for some reason there isn’t an organized gathering for young adults. Consider starting some sort of Sunday School class specifically for young adults. The content of the class isn’t that important, the important thing is that young adults want to journey with other young adults. Provide a class on a New Testament book of the Bible and focus the teaching on how they can apply the principles in their lives as young adults. The important thing with this generation is that there is plenty of time for interaction. Think about putting the group at round tables and let them discuss what they have just learned in the teaching (Either have someone teaching live or find a DVD driven teaching curriculum). Topical studies are great as well. Topics that are good in this environment are: Dating, relationships, work environment, Identity in Christ, Prayer, Finances, etc…..

Weekly Bible Study
• How about a weekly Bible Study focused on Young Adults? This can be at the church in a class room, at the home of a young adult or at the home of a host couple at the church who just loves young adults. A coffee shop or bakery is also a great place for a Bible Study to meet. These can be as informal as people bringing a Bible and asking questions or having a set curriculum for people to study. The Bible Study leaders can be other young adults, a Pastor at the church, or an older mentor couple who has a heart for young adults. For us in our ministry the latter has worked the best. Our young people love that their Small Group leaders are in their 50’s. They have often been believers longer than the young adults have been Christians. It is a great dynamic and one that I hope you would consider opening your young adults up to.

• The night of the week is not that important. Sunday night is a great night, but people have usually been to church that morning and Sunday nights are usually set aside for preparation for the week or for homework. We have seen that Friday nights work well too, but typically are not a great night to reach out to non-believers. Whatever night you choose will have pros and cons, you are going to have to pick a night and go with it.

Monthly / Quarterly Saturday morning Breakfast / Devotional
• These can be a lot more informal and something that may develop friendships and relationships in a more organic way. Find a room in the church or pick a local restaurant and let all the young adults of your church know that you will be meeting there for breakfast on a Saturday morning and share a short devotional and allow the young adults to discuss how the principles of the devotional impact their lives. This can be done monthly or even quarterly. This is a great supplement to a gropu that is just starting and getting off the ground. Maybe start this a few months before you launch a new gathering, Sunday School class or small group.

Men / Women focused gatherings on Friday nights
• This would be a great way to get young adults started as they build a new community. Young Adults in their 20’s and 30’s are typically single (or else they would be in the marriage groups) and have a lot of opinions on the opposite sex. However they often miss the fact that they also need to grow as Godly men and Women. Think about starting separate weekly gatherings on Friday nights (or another night) that focuses specifically on gender specific issues. You will really get the conversation going if you bring up what is expected of a Godly Man / Godly Woman. If you really want to start a dynamic conversation amongst the young adults of your church then mix them up after a few sessions and allow them to talk about what they have learned.

Weekly or Monthly Worship / Prayer service
• See if the sanctuary of the church would be available on a night that the church does not usually meet and see if you can have a worship service in the sanctuary. If there is another room in the church that would be great as well. It would be great if the young adults could have some say in the aesthetics of the room. This does not have to be a fancy gathering, just some people to lead in some worship music, someone to teach or facilitate the teaching / conversation and a time for the young adults to come before God in prayer. It is that simple. Some young adult ministries are very elaborate in the way that their community meets, and it works great for those ministries, but don’t allow yourself to do what would reach your community.

After church fellowship group
• Maybe Young Adults already attend the weekend service but you want to get people together but don’t know if a Sunday School class would be right for this group. Make a few announcements and tell the young adults that others are heading to a certain restaurant after the late service on Sunday for lunch. Pick a restaurant and keep it consistent. It can be weekly or you can say that the 1st Sunday of the month the young adults are going to Denny’s after church. There is something about food that opens up the doors of fellowship.

Once a month activity group
• Pick 12 activities for the year and get some people to help you plan them. They don’t have to be that often, just give people a few weeks notice and get them together for some fun.

The most important thing is for you to read your church and your community. For us we have a lot of young adults at our weekly church services so we started with a Bible Study because the young adults didn’t need another environment. Yet we grew to the point where our Bible Study has grown into a service environment. Find out what the young adults of your community are doing and minister there.